What Happened to Proof Readers?

Good question

Especially in newspaper headlines. You've seen them, those silly statements and awful spelling. Oh, I know it's all about the pressure of deadlines. Or as my friend used to say, that's all for the gnus, now come the head lions! (Sorry about that.)

London couple slain. Police suspect homicide
(They may be on to something!)
Red Tape holds up new bridges
(You mean there's something stronger than Duct Tape?)
 War dims hope for peace
(I can see where it might have that effect!) 
Local high school dropouts cut in half      
(Chainsaw Massacre all over again!)

Well, we may not be journalists, but we also have to watch out for those tricky dangling modifiers. They can sneak into our work without us being aware. I've caught myself time and again.  An example (I didn't write,) Roaring down the highway with screeching tyres, the woman just managed to step out of the way.

Thankfully I found my creative mistakes before the editor or final proof reader did. And I get chills to think of them slipping by unnoticed until some reader points them out, sigh! Still, they make for entertaining reading when you discover someone else's mistakes.

Found on church bulletin boards, these items badly needed proof reading:
* Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.
* The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.
* The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict
*.For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.
* At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’  Come early and listen to our choir practice.
* The Rector will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing: ‘Break Forth Into Joy.’
* During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J. F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.
* Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24th in the church.  So ends a friendship that began in their school days.
* The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment, and gracious hostility.
* Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – Prayer and medication to follow.
* Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I Will Not Pass This Way Again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.


Rita Stella Galieh is currently working on another manuscript and sincerely hopes she will not fall into any of the above humbling traps.
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