Writer's Life: Ebbs and Flows

 by Jeanette O'Hagan

In the last two out of three weekends, Lynne Stringer and I have fronted up to a Speculative Fiction Con - first Brisbane Oz Comic Con at the end of March and then Gold Coast Supanova last weekend.  This year was a little different as sadly Adele Jones couldn't be with us for the two events.  The three of us have being doing Cons together, first as Intricate Worlds, then as Rendered Realms since September 2017.

Both Supanova and Oz Comic are vibrant, entertaining, larger-than-life events that bring together fans, creatives and stars from just about every speculative fiction fandom and medium that you can imagine.  What makes these events special are the enthusiastic fans who put time and effort into their cosplay - costumes of their favourite characters drawn from movies, TV, anime, graphic novels, games, comics and books. And a good proportion of these fans are book lovers who want to support local authors and will often buy the whole series. And we as authors, not only experience all this creativity, not only interact with potential readers and sign our books, but have readers come back for more. Fantastic, right?

Yes, it is. That buzz keeps us coming back, full of excitement and anticipation for the next event. Yet, it's not all highs. The weekend requires preparation and stamina - standing in front of the book table for eight hours over two or sometimes three days, watching people stream past or, after seeming so close to buying, leave with a (usually) empty promise that they will come back. So it can also be exhausting and discouraging. 

On the first day of Oz Comic Con this year, I did not make a single sale - then more than made up for it on the second day.  At Supanova, sales came slowly, in dribs and drabs, until the last three hours, when suddenly things picked up (a great way to finish).

Sometimes, it's hard not to be discouraged. The hours drag (is it really only 11, another 7 hours to go) and the optimism fades. It's tempting to be competitive if one or other of us sells more books. 

In those moments, I make an effort to refocus on why I'm there - yes, selling books, it's nice to at least break even, better to make a profit, but the reason I write is not to pay bills (though that would be good) but so others will read hope-and-faith-infused stories.  Remembering that helps me give the time to God to redeem. And last weekend, instead of looking at the time as a countdown to when it would all finish - I tipped it on it's head - five more hours of opportunity for readers to discover our books. 

Despite slow starts and even barren days, despite both events being different - one smaller the other much bigger and more crowded - we both made decent sales, discovered new readers of our books and had returning customers.  Our books are out there in the wild, hopefully being read and enjoyed by others. 

It reminds me of the days when I plunged back in the world of writing in 2012. The steep learning curve and that long wait to see my work in print.  Positive feedback exhilarated, significant negative feedback could discourage, and watching others being published or winning prizes could lead to insecurity. The waiting seemed to go on forever. Though looking back now, I can see that I was learning and preparing. 

I still remember the buzz when my first short story was accepted into an anthology at the end of 2014. Not that it's necessarily got any easier since then. There is always another goal, something else to reach for, someone else to compare with.  Some years, I've had multiple short stories and poems accepted for publication and novellas or novels published. Other years, I've had more rejections than acceptances and few if any publications. And the elusive 'paying the bills' is like a mirage on ever receding horizon. 

I've realised that I need to trust God's provision and timing. I also need to accept the ebbs and flows. As at the Cons, hours or even a whole day may go by with a few nibbles and no takers - but then suddenly in an hour or two it all turns around. It's not necessarily anything I've done differently - wearing a more colourful dress or more eye-catching headwear as part of my costume, smiling more or being more positive. Each Con is different - sometimes everyone wants to buy a certain title, then next Con that one barely gets a look in, but another one or series becomes more popular. Of course, if we don't plan, prepare and turn up at all, nothing will happen. 

And maybe our writing life is like that too - with ebbs and flows, strong tides that can be beyond our control. And in the midst of those unpredictable currents, I can and will trust the one who made the oceans and directs the waves.

Jeanette O'Hagan has spun tales in the world of Nardva from the age of eight. She enjoys writing fantasy, sci-fi, poetry, and editing. Her Nardvan stories span continents, millennia and cultures. Some involve shapeshifters and magic. Others include space stations and cyborgs.

She has published over forty stories and poems, including the Under the Mountain Series (5 books), Ruhanna's Flight and Other Stories, Akrad's Children and Rasel's Song, the first two books in the Akrad's Legacy series - and new short story accepted for an upcoming Fantasy anthology.

Jeanette has practised medicine, studied communication, history, theology and a Master of Arts (Writing). She loves reading, painting, travel, catching up for coffee with friends, pondering the meaning of life.

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