My Dark Night of the Soul - Melinda Jensen

 

I'm no theological scholar but I’ve long been captivated by the writings of sixteenth century mystic, St John of the Cross. His exquisite treatise on the soul’s journey towards union with its Creator draws me in as surely as the moon draws the tides.

Many argue that humankind’s greatest spiritual challenge is aligning the will with that of the Great I Am, a striving depicted by St John of the Cross in his ‘Dark Night of the Soul’.  This spiritual struggle involves a depth of despair many modern Christians prefer to ignore, lest it threaten their comfortable existences. They prefer, instead, to instruct their careworn brethren to hand everything to God and wait for their lives to ‘work out.’ Proper faith, sufficient repentance and an uncanny knack for knowing exactly what’s in the mind of the Creator, they say, lead us unerringly to abundant living.

I disagree. There are Christians whose lives appear to be charmed; they enter their middle years with secure marriages, fat bank accounts and the freedom to travel, invest, and indulge their whims to their healthy heart’s content. I cannot be counted among their number.

For decades I blamed myself for my lack – for not ‘hearing’ God correctly despite dedication to His Word. I sought pastoral counseling, prayer warriors, Christian literature and of course, scripture itself. My first thoughts, before opening my eyes each morning, have long been directed to my Father, and before those eyes open I ask Him to direct my steps.

It has not, nor has it ever, prevented any injustice, illness or abuse from infiltrating my being.

A brief synopsis of my adult experience includes sexual abuse, abandonment by my children’s father, single parenting without support and, twenty years ago, contracting a debilitating, life-limiting illness that remains with me today. I’ve also suffered verbal and emotional abuse at the hands of an intimate partner, abuse so sadistic that my psychologist describes it as a spiritual crime. I am left now, to face my golden years in poverty and pain.

But don’t grab the tissue box just yet because, frankly, I feel great.

And that, is surely the abundant life scripture promises. Christ came so that we might have life, and have it abundantly. Money is dead. Possessions are dead. Only the human spirit is truly alive.

The breakdown of my marriage, which lasted from 2011 until 2013, heralded my spiritual turning point.

From the outset, I laid my pain before God, never doubting He was ‘for’ marriage and ‘against’ divorce. I trusted Him to guide me towards reconciliation. I repented of every mistake and mis-communication. I begged for guidance and wisdom, and followed His leading to the best of my ability. Honesty and authenticity were integral to my actions. Deceit and manipulation seemed integral to the other party, a man I believed once loved me. I was absolutely certain the Truth would set me free; the Truth would out; the Truth would bring justice to bear.

It did not.

I raged. I told God I was through with Him. I called Him a flawed, gnostic demi-god and accused Him of abandonment. In a logical, worldly sense, He did abandon me. Decades of devotion had led me to naught. Liars and manipulators, I concluded, were the real winners in life. I was nothing but a mug. I dug my heels in and resolutely refused to give God another moment of my time. After all, how much worse could things get?

Weeks slid by. Nothing got worse. Nothing got better.

I wasn't grieving exactly, nor genuinely depressed. Just…empty. Lonely. Terribly lonely. Unfulfilled. Inspiration and creativity deserted me. I was cold. I had no compass for my life’s direction. Life became interminable nothingness.

This…was my dark night.

All the success in the world would never bring light to my soul.

I began, tentatively, to test the waters. Are you still there God? Like a small child, I clung to The Lord’s Prayer, saying it over and over. It was a divine anxiolytic, and from those small steps, I came back to the foot of the Cross.

And so I do not believe in a prosperity gospel; rather, that the treasures God gives us can't be measured by outer circumstances.

I am grateful for my dark night, and yet…a little fearful too. According to St John, there may be more dark nights to come. I hope I recognize them.

 Mother and grandmother, writer concerned with social justice, equality for all; environmentalist who believes we are stewards of the earth, not controllers; follower of Jesus who prefers to think of herself as a Christianarchist.

Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Critique?

Is this how you think of critique?

Depending on how long you’ve been circulating through the Christian writing community, you may have heard or read a conversation that goes something like this:

Writer 1:  Hey, I’ve just finished my 750-page book on the life of Jesus, and I would love some feedback, if you’ve got the time.

Writer 2 (who is a nice helpful sort):  Sure. I probably won’t be able to get through the whole 750 pages [yikes!], but if you send me a copy, I’d be more than happy to have a look at it.

Writer 1 whips a telephone-book-sized manuscript from his backpack and hands it to his vict— er, reader.

Writer 2: Oooph!

One week later …

Writer 1:  Just wanted to know what you thought of my book.

Writer 2, thinking their honest opinion was sincerely wanted: Mate, I can see the truth of what you’re saying. I really can. Lots and lots of … er … truth, so that’s good, but the delivery was a little … um, dry [so dry, in fact, that I think it sandpapered my eyeballs]. Again, though, the teaching was all really solid [like a block of concrete]. So props for that, but it wasn’t, you know, all that … um, fresh. It was a bit like just reading the … you know, Bible.

Writer 1, sounding a teensy bit miffed: Of course the Holy Scriptures are the foundation for the truth, and the spiritually dead won’t appreciate that. As for immature Christians, they don’t have the ability to grasp the deeper concepts of faith.

Writer 2:  [Whoa! Bring back the sun ‘cause I think I just got thrown some shade.] Yeah, well, I’m no Shakespeare, but maybe a bit of editing wouldn’t go astray. Little things, like aisle instead of isle. Lightning instead of lightening. Jesus instead of Jebus. Things like that. And paragraphs. Paragraphs would be good. And maybe a few adjectives now and then.

Writer 1, doing a good impersonation of a Chilean volcano: Editing? I received this message direct from the Holy Spirit. Every single word was inspired by Him. To change any of it would be to interfere with His perfection.

Need I go on? You get the point.

Although that was a slight exaggeration of the worst-case scenario, reactions like this do happen with thin-skinned, tender-hearted writers, and it is particularly difficult when a defence of holy inspiration is invoked. From an editor or publisher’s point of view, that’s when you hand back their telephone book of a manuscript and wish them every success (while thinking, “Don’t let the screen door hit you on the way out.”).

Or do you recognise critique as a gift?

Wielding the “holy inspiration” weapon against critique may protect a sensitive heart, but it does nothing to honour our creative and perfect God. Yes, He does often inspire His writers, but even when that happens, we are all imperfect clay vessels who need to hone and craft that inspiration so it shines for His glory and communicates His message in a clear and engaging way. That’s where critique comes in. In other words, instead of seeing critique and red ink as the enemy, see it (and the one offering the critique) as a blessing straight from the heart of God.

We often make the mistake of thinking that encouragement is only found in good, “positive” feedback. However, encouragement is wasted when a person thinks they already have it all together. Encouragement is a gift of truth, wrapped in love, and tied with grace. It is a shining beacon to help a person find their way when they wander off track (or were never on the track to begin with).

So instead of fighting against that helpful hand, or hiding with fingers in ears until the big, bad critique-giver goes away, step out with fearless confidence and receive the precious gift they are offering. (You can always exchange it later if it doesn’t fit.)

“As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”

(Proverbs 27:17 NIV)

* * *

DEB PORTER is a publisher (Breath of Fresh Air Press), writer, editor, and popular public speaker, with a particular gift for communicating in a way that is both enjoyable and easy for readers and listeners to understand. Deb has been the right hand person at FaithWriters.com since 2003, and is a regular speaker at conferences, but prefers to spend one-on-one time with authors at these events. As the Coordinator of the FaithWriters Writing Challenge since its inception, Deb has helped shape this weekly contest into arguably the most popular aspect of FaithWriters.com, and she now publishes the winning entries in the Mixed Blessings book anthologies.

On effectively disguising characters

Who are you calling a cow?

Jenny Glazebrook

Some people have a natural ability to make up characters from scratch; characters who are believable. People have asked me how I make my characters seem real. How do I make them complex and rounded?

The truth is, they are real. Every one of my works of fiction has begun with someone I know. Even my supporting characters are based on someone I know. Maybe that's because I don't have enough imagination or maybe it's because I have a good memory. Whatever the reason, it is a technique that has worked for me.

However, early in my writing journey I learned how dangerous this technique can be. If your disguise is not strong enough, you could offend and hurt someone.

Like the girl I called a cow.

Really. 

Jersey, to be precise.

Thankfully my editor at the time moved in the same circles I did and he picked it up. He said, 'Jenny do you realise you have called Hannah (let’s call her Hannah because I'm not going to reveal her true identity to anyone else) a cow in this novel?'

I gave him that ‘Did you drink too much Coke whilst editing my book?' kind of look.

'No, really. The character you've named Jersey. She's Hannah, isn't she?'

It was a statement, not a question. My hand flew to my mouth as I realised what I had done. I thought I had made up a good backstory to explain why the character had such an unusual name, but it hadn't been enough. My editor grinned; he seemed to enjoy the whole thing. 'It's okay,' he said. 'I agree Hannah is a cow. But maybe you should change her character's name or disguise her better.'

I don't think I really called her Jersey to get revenge, but it made me think.

Have you seen those cartoons that say something like, 'I am a writer so choose your words carefully or I will kill you off in my next novel.'? Or 'No, I'm not upset with you. I'm just working out what dastardly things I can do to you in my story.'

I laughed the first time I read one of these clever sayings, never dreaming I would do such a thing, let alone realising I had subconsciously done it.

So how have I learned to disguise characters effectively and keep up my appearance of being a lovely person who thinks badly of no living person?

I work out what it is about that person I want or need in my novel. I work out the core of who they are; the essence of their character. That part I hold tightly. It never wavers. Everything else is changed.

For example, if I need someone who is a bully, such as Rod in Nobody Hugs Rod Green, I use the bully's real life words, actions and motivation but I change everything else: name, appearance, siblings, financial status, background, career, interests, parents – anything non-essential.

It can be fun.

In creating these characters, I also imagine why they might be the way they are. Why is the bully a bully? Is it nurture or nature? What has led him or her to this point in their lives and caused their actions and reactions? Making a character complete in this way and making up their whole story in my mind gives them depth when they come out on the page.

My character, Rod Green, is actually a combination of three people; there were lots of bullies in my class at school. Rolling them all into one made a complex, effective bully who made lots of smart comments.

In this novel, Rod bashes his head against a wall in anguish when his father takes his own life. One of the real life Rod Greens bashed his head on a give way sign when his long-time girlfriend dumped him. Until I wrote this, nobody would have linked the two. They look too different; their situations are too different. But the anguish and the passion of the character are the same.

I'm not game to give you any more detailed examples in case someone like my previous editor or even worse, one of the antagonists in my novels, works out who I'm talking about. So the rest will remain completely disguised. I hope.

Before you think badly of me, I should reassure you that using Rod Green was not revenge on the bullies in my class.

Truly.

Not consciously, anyway.

 

Jenny is the wife of Rob Glazebrook and the mother of Micah, Merridy, Clarity and Amelia. They live in the country town of Gundagai with lots of pets. Jenny is the author of 4 published novels with the final 3 of her Aussie Sky Series due out this year. Jenny enjoys inspirational speaking, and is passionate about sharing her writing knowledge and experience and encouraging others in their walk with Jesus. To find out more about her and her books, go to www.jennyglazebrook.com

Day one mixed media portrait

Character Descriptions and Internet Dating

Being a writer is amazing for so many reasons; it's a justification for learning any new skill – but I might have a character who's a deep sea fisher – or for eavesdropping on strangers' conversations on the train – it's dialogue research. One of the unforeseen benefits for me was the symbiosis of writing and internet dating. The factors that make a good internet dating profile are also those that make a great character description, and visa versa. My second book on Amazon was actually a guide to writing online dating profiles for nice guys, using the tricks of a writer. And now I'm going to do the reverse and tell you about the academic research into "computer-mediated communication" and how to apply it to writing character descriptions.

Intentional and Unintentional Cues:
All human interactions are made up of what we intend to show the world, and then what we really do. As a Boarding House supervisor, looking after 15 year old girls, I'm an expert at reading the unintentional cues. 

"Are you doing your homework?" 

"Yes Miss Greentree."

In writing, that appears fine, right? But standing in front of the girl: the refusing to meet my gaze, the sudden lowering of the laptop screen so I can't see it, and then the nervous smile tell a different story. We can't help it, our bodies always betray us.

This is why internet dating freaks so many people out: they only have the person's word for it. So when we're online, we read into every unintentional cue: one misspelt word suddenly means they're uneducated and not very serious about their relationships as they haven't taken the time to proof-read their profile. The aim in a profile, therefore, is to create a consistent message with every piece of information given. The more consistent it is, the more honest it will be rated by other people. And honesty is very attractive.
 

So how can you use this in your writing? By remembering that a character description is not just the first half paragraph of physical attributes you give the audience. Everything will be analysed as part of the character, and if the dialogue or actions don't create a consistent message, the audience will feel cheated. So let's go through the five top ways to strengthen your character's personality.

Number One: The Physical Attributes
Online a picture is worth a thousand words. You can type until your fingers are numb that you're sporty, but if your picture shows a man with a beer gut, it's hard to believe. In writing we get to make up the physical attributes (which would be really useful in real life, just saying) but so many writers waste this opportunity by describing only the boring bits, or not giving the character a physicality inline with the rest of their personality. In my strict belief that no writer should waste words (waste not want not), don't give space on the page to physical attributes that add no personality, and make sure these physical attributes demonstrate the same personality.

Number Two:  Clothing and Method of Wearing Them

I know I'm harsh, but online any guy who has put up a shirtless photo is an immediate 'no', no matter how good his body is. There's truth to the adage that clothing maketh the man, and we should embrace that clothing also maketh the character. However, it's not just what we wear, but how we wear it that can drench a description in vitality. Take this delicious description by P.G. Wodehouse:

She looked like she'd been poured into the dress, and had forgotten to say 'when'.

Without being 'told' anything, we get a gorgeous sense of this character's personality. 

The great thing about clothing is that it changes every scene, and so is a constant update on how the character is developing. Have you taken time to analyse the wardrobe of your main characters and discussed with them why they chose that outfit on that day?

Number Three: Psychological Attributes and Mannerisms
Here is where writing has the advantage over internet dating (well, for the audience at least, as nervous men probably appreciate the limits computers have on this). A fast and effective way to give a character depth is to portray their inner workings through physical mannerisms. A repeated action always suggests something's going on beneath the surface, which is just what we want the audience to believe. The need to straighten every room they enter is a louder message than typing 'she had control issues'. 
I admit that I find this one rather fun, possibly because I have a submajor in psychology, so being able to create my own disorders is like a chemist getting to discover new compounds. So let yourself go wild. Think of the most affecting incident that happened in the character's past, and experiment with how that could manifest now. The only difficulty is to avoid caricatures, overused elements or those that produce a comic effect.

Number Four: Actions
Action is the Show Don't Tell of the real world. Someone can say they're an adrenaline junky, but until I see the evidence of them jumping out of a plane, I'm not sold. In a story, there are three levels of action we need to look out for. First, we start by making sure that plot-wise the character acts in line with their nature, no matter how much we want something else to happen. Then there's what the character does on a scene to scene basis: yes he must confront the bad guy and save the world here, but does he sneak into the secret base, or go in guns blazing? If you've told us he's a highly trained military expert, his actions need to reflect good strategic thinking, not just 'run at them with guns'. Finally, there's backing up the character by the choice of verbs to describe their actions. She walked across the room. Blah. She prowled across the room. Now I'm getting a picture. So go back to the scene where a main character is first introduced. What action can you give them that typifies their personality?

Number Five: Dialogue and Description
A profile is one long monologue, while in writing we get to break this into dialogue and point of view description (if writing in first or limited third). Most profiles (and bad writing) sound lifeless or awkward because there's no consistence between the message and the language. 'I am an active person. I like windsurfing.' Like? Like? What sort of active word is that?
Character is created as much by how something is said or described as by what. Vocabulary is the obvious first point. Anyone who's been around doctors knows they cannot resist being specific; it's not a broken arm, it's a 'fractured radius'. I was seriously put off a book when an average 12 year old described a boy's head as having 'Botticelli curls'. Grammar is another indicator, just think of the person who says 'yous'. Punctuation can also add personality, such as a person who always turns statements into questions. Then there's the length of their speech; the monosyllabic teenager, for example. And finally, think about their focus: imagine a main character who immediately notices all the possibly single men and how expensive their suits are. 

One great tip of dialogue is to take away everything except the actual speech, and see if you can tell who's talking. If not, you need to do some work. 

Another Type of Character Description:
And if you just want to be silly about it, you can do a Neil Gaiman from Neverwhere:

There are four simple ways for the observant to tell Mr. Croup and Mr. Vandemar apart: first, Mr. Vandemar is two and a half heads taller than Mr. Croup; second, Mr. Croup has eyes of a faded china blue, while Mr. Vandemar's eyes are brown; third, while Mr. Vandemar fashioned the rings he wears on his right hand out of the skulls of four ravens, Mr. Croup has no obvious jewelery; fourth, Mr. Croup likes words, while Mr. Vandemar is always hungry. Also, they look nothing at all alike.

So in the end, as with internet dating, just go out there and have fun. 

Buffy Greentree

Short Story Writing - for fun!

by Catriona McKeown

I love writing short stories.

I love novel writing too, the way you can explore characters and situations and see the character change in a way that readers will be able to relate to. But short story writing and novel writing are two very different sorts of writing. Sometimes, I need to walk away from the drawing-blood-from-my-fingertips, oozing-sweat-from-my-brain that novel writing is and just have some fun with my technological pen.

Short story writing lets me do that.

In short story writing, I can just grab any character that sways, staggers or strolls into my imagination. I name them, work out their age, what their occupation is or was, and a relationship status. Then I throw them into a situation to see what they do. Most often, I don't even know what that situation is. I just put the character somewhere - on a beach, in a car, standing at a front door - and describe how they're feeling. I give them an emotion and describe how their body is reacting to that emotion; which body parts are they aware of? What are they seeing? Smelling? Hearing? Tasting? I love contemplating their feet or their hands - how these body parts feel in a character. Revealing some of a character's senses is a great aid for the reader to emotionally engage with the character and understand them.

Then I have my character meet someone and the story flows from there.

Usually, my character has an obvious, small dilemma, but underpinning it is a larger issue they are unaware they need to move on from. In my short story Remembering Rosemary Carter, Rosemary suffers from short term memory loss and needs to discover where she is and why. But running through the story is the importance of forgiveness in families. Another story I am finishing at the moment is about a retired doctor who has had a panic attack after proposing to the woman he loves - but underpinning it is the issue that he hasn't fully recovered from the death of his first wife and daughter.

Short stories are glimpses into a character's life. It may only be ten minutes of their day, but it is a pivotal ten minutes. These stories are such a challenge! Especially if you're writing for a competition that is imposing a word limit. To have a character that is engaging from the beginning, to pull the reader in and make them care about him/her, place them into a situation that is going to impact the character and have them come out different in the end - all within 1500 words? Who wouldn't love it!

What about you? Do you love writing short stories, or do you do something altogether different to take a break?

Well, this is embarrassing...!

I, like most here, love writing devotionals. I see the world in pictures, and often find myself chuckling at rather inopportune moments at the things God reveals to me in my head.

Devotional writing tends to come easily to me; it's a great blessing and one I don't take for granted.

At least I didn't think I did. Until today.

Unlike my last sheduled CWD blogspot, which I quite simply forgot about - my apologies once again - I have had this one at the forefront of my mind for some time now. And I've been actively using my senses to hear/see from God as to what he wants me to write about.

Nothing.

More looking, more seeking.

Still. . . nothing.

As the days moved closer, my senses started going into overdrive! God, what do you want me to share?!

Silence.

Even now, as I sit here and type, I am pleading with God to give me something - anything - that might sound better than this confession.

Because it feels feeble to write that I have nothing. 

Have I failed God?  Did I not pray hard enough or look hard enough? Surely I could scrounge up something that would "meet the criteria" and sound so much better than...well, than writing about my desperation!

I wonder if I should have handballed this spot to someone else, someone with a pre-scheduled, fully edited and truly awesome message ready to go?!

No, that's not the answer.

So then God, tell me, what is the answer?! What do I do when I have nothing to say?!

You always have something to say Helen; you can praise me!

When it feels that I am silent, praise me.
When it feels that you are getting nowhere, praise me.
When you are doubting where you are walking, praise me.
When it feels that the road ahead is blocked, praise me!

Remember that King Jehoshaphat won the battle when he and his men praised me! They did not put their trust in their own strength, but called upon my name and sang praises to me before facing their enemy.  And then I moved in power and in might, and I defeated their enemies before them! 

Ahh, yes, this most wonderful tale of King Jehoshaphat, found in 2 Chronicles 20. It has always been one of my most treasured scriptures, revealing to us the importance of praising God when facing our enemies.

And so today I have been reminded of two things; firstly, I never have "nothing" to say! No matter what blockages I might be facing in my mind, my spirit is never without praise and exhortation of my God, who is my everything! 

And, secondly, as I begin to praise my God, he will start to move things in the spiritual and natural realms, allowing my gift of exhorting and encouraging others might flow as it should. 
Not for my sake alone, but that I might be blessed to be a blessing to others. 

I pray that as I have struggled and shared today, that my revelation would be one that opens up the gates of your praise, and brings breakthrough in whatever areas might feel blocked in your ministry. Keep on praising Him, no matter what, and trusting in his strength to flow through your natural abilities, and your breakthrough will happen.

With many blessings,

Helen Curtis