Tell Me More!

 by Anusha Atukorala

One day, not long ago, I turned to a friend for prayer. What I needed was someone who listened, asked a question or two to know more and then prayed for me. My friend, let’s call her Simone – did do what I asked for and I was grateful. But … she talked. Too much! The instant I shared my prayer request and before I could finish, she began sharing similar situations in her life – which in truth, had little bearing in my own. She meant well and I did appreciate her praying for me. However … she didn’t understand my need - she made invalid assumptions without first listening.

Simone didn’t understand what caring for a friend means in the fullest sense. Which is … talking less and listening more. Talking less and praying more. She in fact taught me what I needed to do, if a friend approached me for prayer. Not to talk more or make assumptions. But simply to listen. And then to say ‘Tell me more!’ Isn’t that what friendship and caring are about? Seeking to learn more about another in order to support them well! Psychologists talk of curiosity being important in a relationship. I prefer the word 'interest’ rather than curiosity. When someone is interested in another’s feelings or life or experiences, it helps. Tell me more! Three words that can make a difference.

 

A good listener, draws out another by an attitude of ‘Tell me more’ even if she doesn’t mouth the words. And of course … a good writer answers the question ‘Tell me more’ that’s asked by an interested reader. There are books and books. Some books I can leave aside. Others I can’t put down. Tell me more, I cry in my reader’s heart as I turn the pages swiftly and read more. I’m eager to get to the end of the story but also don’t want to reach the finale, because I am enjoying it too much! Have you been there? It’s a great feeling is it not, (despite it being a conundrum)!

 

Writing a best seller that draws readers wanting more, is a writer’s dream come true. These days, sadly I can’t get to the library as often as I used to (it used to be once a week – now, it’s more like once in a few months due to my ill health), so I check the writers whose books I’ve greatly enjoyed and put more of theirs on hold – then ask my beloved to pick them up for me on his weekly trip to the library. My unspoken question then towards each of these gifted writers is ‘Tell me more’! If one of their novels was an exceptional read, their other books too are sure to be enjoyable.

You know, it blesses me deeply when a friend says ‘So tell me more. What is it like to live with chronic fatigue?’ Or ‘It must be so difficult for you, not having the energy to do basic tasks. Tell me about it?’ But few people realise that it’s a way of helping me and others with chronic illness. I know that it’s not that they don’t care, it’s just that they have not experienced the challenges and don’t realise the power of being heard. People are often fixers – they want to fix broken things. But when broken things cannot be fixed ... listening is a way of fixing what cannot be fixed.

Tell me more! Three little words that can bless another. My beloved blesses me often by letting me vent and complain when I have unbearable pain or debilitating fatigue. After I share – even just one sentence, I feel so much better. And then I can move ahead to be more positive.

 

In our experiences with others as believers, we can bless them through our attitude ‘Tell me more.’ Do we instead formulate responses in our head about what we’d say in response, even before our friend stops speaking? I’m sure we are all guilty of it. And what of our walk as believers? ‘Dear Jesus, do tell me more’,  should be our heart’s spiritual posture every day. Last year, when my church Bible study group studied ‘Learning to discern God’s Voice’ – a powerful study by Priscilla Shirer, we were asked to list a few questions of what we hoped to hear from God.

 

A question I asked God that He answered most fully was: Who are you God? He responded to it in amazing ways, not once, not twice but many many times over. I learnt so much about Him that I hadn’t known before. It made me realise that God wants us to seek Him and know Him better and better. So here’s a challenge for all us. Let’s learn to write so well, that readers will say ‘I want more. Tell me more’. Let’s learn to listen to others with a stance of ‘Tell me more about your joys and sorrows. I am listening’. And in our spiritual lives, let’s have an attitude of seeking and finding God in full measure.

 

And now dear listener, dear reader, dear writer, dear friend. 

Here is my question today: 

“Tell me more about yourself. What are your own hopes and dreams? Tell me more! I am listening.”

Anusha’s been on many interesting detours in life, as a lab technician, a computer programmer, a full time Mum, a full time volunteer, a charity director, a full time job chaser, until one golden day (or was it a dark moonless night?) God tapped her on her shoulder and called her to write for Him. She has never recovered from the joy it brought her. She loves to see others enjoying life with Jesus and does her mite to hurry the process in her world through her writing and through her life. The goodness of God is her theme song through each season, as she dances in the rain with Jesus.

 

Her first book Enjoying the Journey contains 75 little God stories that will bring you closer to your Creator. Her 2^nd book ‘Dancing in the Rain’ brings you hope and comfort for life’s soggy seasons. Her 3rd book, ‘Sharing the Journey’ is a sequel to 'Enjoying the Journey'.

 

Do drop in on her two websites to say G’day! She’d love to connect with you.

Dancing in the Rain 

Light in the Darkness