Being writers, I would hope that most of us are familiar
with the story of Pip, his infatuation with Estella and misplaced hope in Miss
Havisham (sorry to those reader’s who’ve not read this Dicken’s classic).
After
Pip has reached the pinnacle of society, is dressed as a gentleman and mixing
with all the cream of high society, he discovers that the person who has funded
his education, has paid all his bills and who has promised him the great
expectation of a fortune to live on is not Miss Havisham. It is the dirty,
violent convict from his childhood—the man who forced him to steal a pie and an
iron file. Miss Havisham has only ever designed his torment. The convict—who
made good in the colony of New South Wales, running sheep—is the one who has
felt kindly towards Pip. The convict is the one who has sacrificed all for Pip’s
benefit. When Pip discovers this shocking truth, he is not only disappointed,
he is disgusted. This is not what he expected. This is not how he’d planned for
his life to turn out. At this point, Pip loses his hope, his joy and his peace.
I’ve been pondering on this idea of lost hope, lost joy and
lost peace. How often have we misplaced our hope, thinking our joy and our
peace will come if only we can get that certain job; if only we can marry; if
only we can have children; if only our children will give us grandchildren; if
only we have that house, or that car, or that overseas holiday; if only our
book will be published?
Honestly, I’ve probably been in that place of believing my
joy will be complete when one or all of those things come to pass. And I’ve
also been in that place where those things have come to pass, and yet, things
don’t always turn out how we plan. Things go wrong. Relationships go south. Kids
get annoyed with their parents. Books don’t always sell.
Do you recall the Israelites at the foot of Mount Sinai?
Moses was up on the mountain seeking the face of the Lord and the people began
to fidget. Where’s Moses? What’s taking him so long? They come to Aaron and
suggest they build a golden calf whom they can worship. And Aaron—who knows
what’s going on in his head?—gets all the gold and makes a carved idol. Then
they stand around singing, feasting and dancing and saying that this dumb
statue has brought them up out of Egypt. How dumb can you be and still breath?
Where were they when the plagues were raining down, and the angel of death
passed over the land? How quickly did they forget who their Lord and deliverer
was?
Dumb idols. Bread and water that doesn’t satisfy.
Do we do the same thing ourselves? Where is God? What’s
taking him so long to bring healing in my family? What’s taking him so long to
help me achieve my purpose? When will I ever be financially comfortable so I
can sit on a pool floaty and drink a pineapple cocktail?
At this point, we sometimes make idols of ourselves, or our
jobs, or our family, or our feelings.
But the Bible is clear:
Psalm 16:11 (NKJV)
“You will show me the path of
life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”
Romans 15:13 (NLT)
“ I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you
completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with
confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.”
There are loads more Scriptures
that clearly express how our hope, when placed in the Lord, will yield both joy
and peace. I encourage you to do a word search and you will be encouraged by
the Scriptures that come up.
Disappointment is going to come
in life. We do have great expectations—our society, media and education promotes
these pictures of just what we can expect to fulfil our every desire. But when
it boils down, while one person is digging in and insisting on their rights to
be happy, that right will come at someone else’s cost. The culture of personal
rights is OK, but it isn’t what brings joy and peace.
Even in the midst of suffering, a
person can find joy. Remember, the Apostle Paul, who wrote a heap about the joy
of the Lord and the peace that passes understanding, was not writing poolside
at the Hilton. He was in prison, suffering beatings, knowing that the church
members were being persecuted by the despot, Nero—thrown to the lions and
burned as human torches. These were the conditions from which he encouraged us
to rejoice in the Lord always. The only way to be able to achieve this is to
make sure that we haven’t got our expectations set to the standard of the
current social status, and that we don’t build dumb idols of our career, family
or stuff that we own.
Put your hope in the Lord, and
pursue him, and in Him, you will find the fullness of joy and the peace that
passes understanding.
Even in grief and disappointment,
take those feelings to the Lord, and rest a while in His comfort. There you
will find peace.
Expectations are exciting, but it
is when we build up expectation based on a commercial or Hollywood image, and
wait for those things to bring us satisfaction that we realise our hope is
misplaced. I have been practising this way of giving my family a break. I don’t
rely on them as the source of my joy. I have been practising finding that joy
in the source of life itself—in Christ alone—and so disappointments, when they
come, don’t have the ability to defeat me, as they may have done in the past. And
what I expect of others is no longer so high that it’s a burden to them. They
shouldn’t have to bear the weight of making me successful, fearing my disappointment
when they can’t meet that expectation.
It is a freeing place to be. Once
Pip began to understand who his benefactor was, and he stopped idolising Miss
Havisham and Estella, he began to appreciate what he had been given, and the
man who had given it.
God bless you as you take stock
of your expectations, and as you seek the source of joy and peace. You won’t be
disappointed.
South Australian
Author, Meredith Resce, has been
writing since 1991, and has had books in the Australian market since 1997.
Following the
Australian success of her “Heart ofGreen Valley” series, they were released in the UK and USA.
‘Hell on the Doorstep’ is
Meredith’s 19th published project, the second non-fiction.
Apart from writing,
Meredith also takes the opportunity to speak to groups on issues relevant to
relationships and emotional and spiritual growth.
Meredith has also been
co-writer and co-producer in the 2007 feature film production, “Twin Rivers”.
With her husband,
Nick, Meredith has worked in Christian ministry since 1983.
Meredith and Nick have
three adult children, one daughter and two sons.
I appreciated this article. When we delight ourselves in the Lord, the desires of our heart will be what he also desires for us, and will give us. The key is always to delight ourselves first and foremost in the Lord. Which I find is easier to write than to do consistently!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your thoughts. I hadn't realised that feelings could be added to the list of potential idols that I need to keep an eye out for. I am now underlining the anxiety and fear that has made it difficult for me to see God's joy in my life in recent days, and to understand the power that I have given them.
ReplyDeleteWhen I went to add some notes about your post to my prayer journal, I turned the illustrated page, and there was a companion quote (I love the way the Holy Spirit likes to reinforce the message):
"God wants nothing from us except our needs and these furnish Him with room to display His bounty when He supplies them freely... Not what I have, but what I do not have, is the first point of contact between my soul and God." Charles H Spurgeon.
'Hope deferred makes the heart sick...' Many times I have experienced my heart being sick. Now days I make my hope adjust to the word of God. Then it is never deferred and my heart remains or returns to a good place!
ReplyDeleteThanks for a great blog Meredith.
Hi Meredith, you've touched a spot with me too. Great Expectations has always been one of my very favourite Dickens novels, and that might be because there is so much to relate to in Pip's experiences. As Jo commented above, I've had my fair share of that sort of heart sickness too. What a great reminder to consider how we face it.
ReplyDelete