As I am working on my book, Fat Girls Can Dance, I am looking at a whole range of personal development concepts. One of these is the whole issue of self-acceptance based on uniqueness. We know that we are unique, but how can that help us to live happier, healthier and more connected lives?
Firstly, we are unique because our Creator designed us to have 97% in common with other human beings, but 3% of our DNA uniquely defining who we will be - our hair colour, eye colour, skin tone, voice pitch, size of body, personality etc.
The Psalmist David puts it like this... "You knit me together in my mother's womb..." (Psalm 139:13)
God intimately became entangled with the crafting of each person.
Jeremiah says, "Before I was born you knew me." (Jeremiah 1:5)
And David goes on to say, "Such knowledge is to wonderful for me", referring to the intimate knowledge that God has of each of us. (Psalm 139:6)
So this got me thinking about the struggle most people have with loving themselves. The struggle of not comparing themselves to others and finding themselves lacking. What does an individual need to know about themselves that will set them free from self-doubt and self-rejection? I believe it is an understanding of how their loving Creator has taken consideration for them as an individual.
Secondly, we all have a unique bar code that God gave us at birth, our fingerprint, which is like a sign to say, 'Hey, I'm an original!'
No two fingerprints are the same. God saw fit to intimately desire to imprint himself on each of us in a unique way.
The complexity of our body systems, our personality traits and our brain's capacity is mind boggling. Everything about how we are created screams of a loving Creator, intimately acquainted with even 'the hairs on our head', numbering them. (Matthew 10:30)
Then this started me down the pathway of the concept of 'normal' and 'perfect'. What is 'normal' and what is 'perfect'?
Well, I have concluded that 'normal' is actually a myth, because for their to be a norm you must be comparing like with like and finding anomalies and on the grounds of uniqueness there are no two humans completely alike. There may be similarities, as in the case with identical twins, but there are just as many anomalies!
In the area of perfection, this is also relative. I am perfectly me. I may not behave in a way that others think is perfect, but it is perfectly me. So if I stop the comparisons, the playing to the expectations of the crowd and really love and accept who I am in this moment, then I can embrace this concept of perfection.
And if I add to that what Jesus says about perfection, that He has made everyone perfect, then why would I need to be on my own case about chasing some mysterious state that I have no hope of achieving, when seriously all I need to do is to accept what Christ has done for me?
Hebrews 10:8 says, "He has perfected forever those who are being sanctified." That means you and I, if we are believers.
So if I am unique, perfectly me and normal for me, how much better is my life going to be when I really allow that truth to settle inside me and I embrace the huge love gift of God's acceptance in my life? Then I can truly say and believe, "I am enough. I have enough. I do enough."
How many people are chasing the elusive state of perfection or feeling like they are not normal, trying to fit into something that no-one can even define? Imagine if they could believe that in this moment there is nothing they have to do to be acceptable, that they are actually 100% okay. That is what real grace and unconditional love does for a person - it sticks their feet on a solid foundation based on love and grace. That's what the prodigal son's Dad modelled when he returned home - complete acceptance and grace. Change, if required, then flows out naturally.
So, I guess I just wanted to remind you that you are perfect, normal and unique. Perfectly loved by a creator who knows you intimately and desires to have a relationship with you every moment of every day. Now that is pretty cool, don't you think?
About Author: Hayley Solich is the Editor of Golden Pen For Christian Women's Magazine and Golden Pen Magazine, a published author and business mentor. Hayley works with individuals to help them self publish their books by providing editing and design services. http://christianwomenmagazine.com or www.hayleysolich.com.
Thanks for the reminder Hayley! It's always refreshing to realise the truth of what you depicted. God loves us as we are. And that each of us unique and perfectly 'me'.
ReplyDeleteI think it sets us free from striving to become like others. And from forgetting to play our own music. Because we each need to play our own tunes in order to sound together as one grand orchestra don't we? :)
Absolutely, Anusha. That is exactly what I am about...helping people to realise they are important for the bigger picture, with every different coloured thread bringing clarity to the tapestry!
DeleteThank you for commenting. :)
Hi Hayley,
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post and well worth saving to ponder over, as I'm sure many of us need the reminder often. I love how you've proved that 'normal' is a myth. Isn't it amazing how that 3% of DNA makes each of us so totally unique? Yeah, let's all be perfectly us!
Thanks, Paula. Yes! When I learned that about our DNA I was rejoicing because I already had that revelation of God bar coding us, but that just seemed to scream intelligent design to me. :)
DeleteLove that expression about God 'bar coding' us. It's a very truth! (see 2 Peter 1:3) I'm wondering, have you come across the revelatory teaching by the New Zealand preacher, Ian Clayton? He has much teaching on DNA, divine and human and expounds from Genesis like I've never heard elsewhere. Worth googling!
DeleteI hope your book will bless many women, Hayley. It is sorely needed in our culture of prescribed norms! Keep thanking the Lord for that wonderfully, uniquely, perfectly made YOU :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much, Margaret. I feel it has some destiny on it and yes, I am hoping it will be a bondage breaker for women of all shapes and sizes.
DeleteThanks Hayley..I love being perfectly me, Loved perfectly by our perfect Heavenly Father....now that is just perfect isn't it?
ReplyDeleteYes indeed, Di. :) If only everyone had that extraordinary revelation I think we would have a much happier world. :)
DeleteWhat an amazing God. Such an awesome creator. There is no norm so there is no way we can compare other to ourselves. Each one of us made perfect. Great post Hayley.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jo. And so therefore we can trust that we are able to make good choices, choices that are perfectly right for us and those we love.
DeleteGood on you Hayley. We all need that reminder that we are unique and not be squeezed into someone else's idea of normal.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Dale. I think this goes across our writing styles as well and our voice. The more we embrace our own voice, the stronger our work becomes. :)
DeleteIt's great to realize we don't have to be part of the "IN CROWD" because we might be different and have different interests to the "NORMALS". Our God is a God of huge variety and gives us the leeway to be totally unique.
ReplyDeleteYes, Hayley, it's nice just 'being ourselves'.
I love his variety. I always think of us as different blooms in God's vase. There are the roses which are a bit prickly but smell divine. The daisies that just make your heart go yay. The lavendars that soothe. The sunflowers that light up the world. We have so many different varieties, shapes, sizes and all are beautiful.
DeleteGod is just so clever!