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Image courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net/FrameAngel |
Well, me too. How ‘bout that?
It’s a subject I notice Christians seem to be skirting
around, not addressing from any aspect, let alone a scriptural one.
So…me too. I’m one of tens of millions, probably more. For
women in this lucky country…Australia…the figure sits at a disturbing one in
five women. Look around you. Yes, you! In Church. Look around you. One in five
females has been a victim of sexual violence. That’s not counting every-day,
garden-variety sexual harassment. If we factor that in, I reckon the figure is
more like one in one. That’s all of us. Married. Single. Engaged. Divorced. It
doesn’t matter. We’re all ‘fair game.’
The ‘Me Too’ campaign has erupted in the wake of the Harvey
Weinstein expose. In case you haven’t caught up on the news this fortnight and
don’t know who Weinstein is, I’ll briefly recap.
Harvey Weinstein is a vastly successful, renowned and widely
lauded movie producer. He is, of course, also immensely wealthy. That goes with
the territory.
So too, it seems, does an enormous sense of entitlement that
underpins the ugly underbelly of the current climate of rampant narcissistic machismo
that sets the tone for our entertainment industry. He has, seemingly without
reservation, propositioned, touched, threatened and downright sexually assaulted
(let’s call it for what it is…raped!) huge numbers of actresses…sorry ‘actor is
now the politically correct term. But the ‘actors’ he targets are all female.
So far he’s been accused by around 50 women and that figure is escalating by
the day.
Some of his targets have tried to report his actions. Others
have been cowed. The overwhelming complicity from other men in the industry is,
possibly, even more disturbing (and I’ll never watch another Matt Damon movie
again. And then there’s Tarantino, not so much of a surprise but a bigger
disappointment, given the sway he holds in the industry. He’s sorry now, but
hey, too late). They knew. They observed. They were told. But they did nothing.
It would compromise their careers if they did. Actually, I have that wrong.
They did more than nothing. They actively worked to cover up Weinstein’s sexual
abuse and harassment. And so, these women were left unprotected…un-championed.
Disbelieved. And so they were shut up.
The real ‘shock’, however, (not to me) is that women the
world over…ordinary women with ordinary jobs and lives and families, experience
the same humiliation and degradation that well-known actresses are only just
now feeling safe enough to expose. Think about that. Wealthy, ’perfect’ women
in privileged positions, living fairy-tale lives, are only just now gaining the
fortitude and courage to tell the sordid stories that are part and parcel of
their daily existence.
Their stories have been enormously triggering for women and
girls the world over. Add to that the widespread lack of empowerment the
average woman experiences, even in this so-called enlightened age, where women
are supposedly valued and equal…and you have a seething, boiling, wave of anger
and resentment that is gaining momentum with every ‘me too’ posted on social
media. Many of us don’t know what to do with the pain that is rising to the
surface; pain we bury deep in order to survive just being female in this world.
We desperately hope the whole thing doesn’t just fizzle and die, and yet, it
may well do.
I have absolutely no idea how I would navigate life with its
everyday experiences that include, for me as for so many, the degradation and
humiliation of being reduced to an object of little value; something to be judged,
sentenced, tortured and humiliated by the very beings God put on this earth to
protect me and provide for me - I do not know how I would have survived so far
without Jesus. I truly don’t.
I’ve worked in a Christian counselling environment wherein I
was entrusted with the files and stories of hundreds of people, right here
where I live, in this small, conservative, and overwhelmingly Christian city.
If you’re under the illusion things are vastly different in Christian
communities, please think again. The complicity of the Christian hierarchy
mirrors that of the secular world. In many ways, it’s worse. There’s more than
just a cover up. There is enablement through lack of condemnation for the
perpetrators’ actions, a noticeable absence of any consequences and a
widespread hushing up of victims.
Overall, there’s still a distressing tendency for the blame
to be placed on ‘Eve’. Where there is seduction, she (the woman), is all-too-often
deemed the temptress, even if she has rebuffed the advances. If sexual harassment
has taken place and is made public, it’s overwhelmingly the woman who loses face,
support and fellowship within the Church. She is far too often cast out of the
community…while ‘he’ remains in leadership and worship positions. He is
forgiven and allowed to continue his spiritual life, without missing a beat.
She is left floundering, wandering alone in the desert…to pick up the threads…start
a new life…somewhere else where she hopes they know nothing of her past.
Yes, I have witnessed it. Yes, I have experienced it. Not
just harassment (as if that’s a trivial thing?) but sexual abuse and rape. I’m
here. I’m raw. I’m telling it like it is.
I’ve experienced it first hand, and through the stories of
hundreds of others.
So, yes. Me too. I have a tender saviour, who holds me so
gently, and yet with such power and strength. In the final analysis, I’m okay.
But the Body of Christ has the distraught and damaged
spirits of many of its women to answer for. We cry out for understanding and
help. We reach out, mostly, to each other – other women who feel our feminine
pain.
And yet…it is not yet enough.
I don’t propose to have the answers or the expertise to
suggest a course of action but I do feel compelled to bring this issue before
you all; to ask the question; to open the dialogue. We have an opportunity to
be part of a massive wave of change and healing that will benefit the entire
Christian community. Half the body of Christ is deeply wounded…and floundering.
Let’s go to Jesus with that, shall we? Men and women alike.